You know there's not really much anyone can say... I've heard all the typical things you would say to someone- "it gets better", "give it time", "you deserve better" etc... To be honest nothing helps. Even if it's happened to you, we can't compare ourselves. Love between two people is different, so heart break between two people is different. How it feels to you is different. It's been 3 month and my wound still feels fresh, it still feels like i have a gaping hole in my chest. I still think about her everyday, every minute, every second and the scary thing is I actually believe that I will never get over her. she is and will always will be my first love, the one i fell so hard for I lost myself in the process and rotated my life around her.
I met her almost a years ago, we were an awful set up our destiny in an attempt to find me- the sad lonely one- an ANGEL. She didn't seem like anything special and to be honest I was looking for her to be more than my first kiss. At 23 I wasn't looking for anything else. I remember that night very clearly, the awkward eye contact and avoidance... but what i remember the most was the feeling that she was different than anyone I'd met before. For awhile after that night we talked, got to know each other, became more than friends. We broke up and she didn't talk to me :( What she doesn't know is that I can remember every single time in these 3 months I saw her, I wasn't over her but I wasn't about to let her know that, so I pretended to live my life. The next time we talked to each other, she was about to be everything to me.
I fell in love with her. I didn't even know what love was but I think I figured it out, that feeling took me awhile to name but I felt it.I still do. We shared everything, we shared the best parts of our year, and now being forced into adulthood we've changed. She doesn't want me anymore, she said she needs to figure out who she is and I'm stopping her. I've blamed myself, i still do. I'm full of so much regret and guilt and it never goes away. We're still 'friends', we talk and I'm not going to lie and say we haven't had those nights before. The sad thing is I still love her and although i know you're supposed to distance yourself to try to move on, I can't, I'm holding on to her with everything i have. Our relationship lasted almost one year, but what we had, I know it will never leave me.You can call me naive and too young but to me love doesn't have an age restriction. I'm not over it, I don't know if I will be.
I just miss her so much, i miss everything. I hurt all the time, I break all the time, I want her all the time. she left me an empty shell, wounding me so much I physically hurt.I'm not sure what to do anymore. I lie in bed for hours just thinking, just hurting. I want her back. I want us back.
Teddy (MOTU), i miss you
And m here just waiting for u my BAchaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I met her almost a years ago, we were an awful set up our destiny in an attempt to find me- the sad lonely one- an ANGEL. She didn't seem like anything special and to be honest I was looking for her to be more than my first kiss. At 23 I wasn't looking for anything else. I remember that night very clearly, the awkward eye contact and avoidance... but what i remember the most was the feeling that she was different than anyone I'd met before. For awhile after that night we talked, got to know each other, became more than friends. We broke up and she didn't talk to me :( What she doesn't know is that I can remember every single time in these 3 months I saw her, I wasn't over her but I wasn't about to let her know that, so I pretended to live my life. The next time we talked to each other, she was about to be everything to me.
I fell in love with her. I didn't even know what love was but I think I figured it out, that feeling took me awhile to name but I felt it.I still do. We shared everything, we shared the best parts of our year, and now being forced into adulthood we've changed. She doesn't want me anymore, she said she needs to figure out who she is and I'm stopping her. I've blamed myself, i still do. I'm full of so much regret and guilt and it never goes away. We're still 'friends', we talk and I'm not going to lie and say we haven't had those nights before. The sad thing is I still love her and although i know you're supposed to distance yourself to try to move on, I can't, I'm holding on to her with everything i have. Our relationship lasted almost one year, but what we had, I know it will never leave me.You can call me naive and too young but to me love doesn't have an age restriction. I'm not over it, I don't know if I will be.
I just miss her so much, i miss everything. I hurt all the time, I break all the time, I want her all the time. she left me an empty shell, wounding me so much I physically hurt.I'm not sure what to do anymore. I lie in bed for hours just thinking, just hurting. I want her back. I want us back.
Teddy (MOTU), i miss you
And m here just waiting for u my BAchaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
No comments:
Post a Comment